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App of the Week: YouTube Kids

YouTube Kids
Publisher: Google
Platform: Android, iOS
Price: Free!

What did we do before the age of the Internet and television when it came to getting the kids out of our hair for a few hours? Was there ever a time when children played outside or ran off with friends to have adventures? Is it just me or are the little buggers born with touch-enabled devices attached to their little grabbers?

Well, I suppose it doesn't much matter. It's the way of the future! Kids and tablets! Kids and phones! Kids and all the abhorrent things the Internet has to offer.

I'll be the first to admit that my YouTube account curates some fairly screwy videos. As such, I wasn't inclined to let my toddler use it to watch videos of monster trucks, trains, and nursery rhymes. After all, who knows what will pop up on the auto play? On the flip side of that, going into YouTube without any account can be just as dangerous due to what is trending. As such, when it came time to binge watch hours of monster trucks squishing cars, I had to take control of what was playing next. And, as any parent will tell you, most children's programming is absolutely mind-numbing (except you, Haunted House Monster Truck).

So, when I stumbled upon a dedicated YouTube Kids app, I was thrilled. The app will curate videos in selected age groups, plays them in full screen, and allows downloading for offline viewing (perfect for car rides!). Additionally, it is tied to the parent's YouTube account, so there is a full record of what has been played. Search can be turned off, and the additional parental controls are easy to configure.

It's been great for my little guy and he hasn't had a complaint when using it on a phone or tablet. My only complaint is that Peppa Pig is now slowly invading my life.

App of the Week: Authentic Weather

Authentic Weather
Publisher: House of van Schneider
Platform: Android, iOS
Price: Free!

Since getting a smart phone, I've found the one thing I'm always on the hunt for is a decent weather app. I've tried so many that I've lost count and they all fall short in one way or another. Either they're too cluttered with information or they lack basic information or there are intrusive ads or the layout is just awful. It's too much. Just tell me the fucking weather and look good while you do it.

Well, hello Authentic Weather. I didn't see you over there. AW is the most straight forward and sassy weather app I've had the pleasure of using. After finding your location, AW will give you a summary of the weather. As I write this, it says "It's fucking cloudy. You can look outside to get more information." It's very astute.

Pulling down from the top gives a little more info about the forecast in addition to the temperature. It will display the weather for today, tomorrow, and whenever. Purchasing the full version of the app unlocks the ability to add a photo (via camera) to the forecast and share it on social media.

While it doesn't have the bells and whistles of so many other weather apps, Authentic Weather also lacks all the bullshit. While it may not be the weather app I check right away, it's still the one I check most often.

The Unwashed Asses 011: Video Games and Musicals



Christian talks musicals and video games.

Patreon: www.patreon.com/ZeroAnd09

Opening song: Young Men Dead, The Black Angels
Closing song: Disappearing Dark, Get Set Go

Friday Night Smite - 04/14/2017





Patch 4.5 and the Celestial Voyage hit console, the gang embarks on a few quests, and get a few good matches in.



Patreon: patreon.com/fridaynightsmite

Overwatch: Uprising





The Uprising event in Overwatch has gone live. I go over the new skins, emotes, and horde mode.

Friday Night Smite - 04/07/2017



4.5 is delayed again! 4.6 has been announced! The gang gets schooled in Starcraft!

Zero Lives - Ep. 064: Ryse Pt. 2





Hey there, stranger! Zero Lives has a new format on a new channel! Now, if only Ryse knew how to change it up every now and then.

The Unwashed Asses 010: Super Powers and Destiny



Christian talks about dying phones, stealing donuts, Destiny 2, and what would happen if he had super powers.

Patreon: www.patreon.com/ZeroAnd09

Opening song: Young Men Dead, The Black Angels
Closing song: Disappearing Dark, Get Set Go