Today was the hardest day of my life.  Today, I held my unborn son. 

We found out last Friday that we had miscarried.  Even if she had stayed in bed the entire time, we still would have lost the baby.  I don't know how or why.  I thought we were safe, making it through the first trimester.  Yesterday, we went back to the doctor for the confirmation.  We were scheduled to have the remains removed today at noon.  This morning, the baby passed on its own.  At 6:45am, I held my unborn child's lifeless body.  I doubt I will ever experience anything more painful.

He was the best part of me.  His tiny body fit into the palm of my hand, and I could not let him go.  This was my son.  I've never loved anything so much in my life.

We headed to the hospital right away.  An ultrasound was performed, with Mom being in optimal health.  It was then that we handed our baby's body to the doctor.  I will never see him again.  I will never hear him laugh, or feel his warmth as I rock him to sleep.  For a brief 15 seconds, I heard his heart beat.  It is a sound I will never forget.

We named him Jack.

To Jack

You know what I've realized?  Life is good.  I have a wonderful life.  I have a woman who loves me, a child on the way, and one hell of a video game collection.

Growing up, I wasn't sure what I was going to do with my life.  Five years ago, I still wasn't sure.  I've taken life at a very laid back pace.  For a long time, my philosophy has been, "Whatever happens, happens."  I think it has worked out.  Life is on track for being awesome.

For the first time in a long while, I feel content.  I sit at the in laws, just having eaten.  I'm fat, happy, and very warm in my fleece.  It's truly the little things that add up and make everything sublime. 

For a long time, I've wondered what my purpose in life was.  What role I was meant to fill.  I'm shocked to admit that once I learned I was going to be a father, I felt like I had acheived my purpose.  The primal drive to pass on one's genes.  It's so simple, I didn't think it would feel this wonderful.  I'm going to be a father and love something for the first time in my life on a totally different level.  I still feel that I need to make something of myself, but now I have one more reason to do so.  It seems cliche, and I'm sure that millions of others have experienced this.  It's something we can all relate to, those that have passed on their legacy.

My goal now, is to make sure my child has a legacy worth inheriting.

October 2010 Release Calendar

October 3:
Wii Party  (Wii)

October 4:
Pokemon Ranger: Guardian Signs  (DS)
Shantae: Risky's Revenge  (DS)
Racer's Islands: Crazy Racers  (Wii)

October 5:
Castlevania:  Lords of Shadow  (360, PS3)
Ben 10 Ultimate Alien: Cosmic Destruction  (PSP, PS3, 360, PS2)
John Daly's ProStroke Golf  (PS3)
NBA 2K11  (360, PS3, Wii, PS2, PSP, PC)
Def Jam Rapstar  (Wii, 360, PS3)
Final Fantasy: The 4 Heroes of Light  (DS)
Enslaved: Odyssey to the West  (360, PS3)
NBA Jam  (Wii)
Left 4 Dead 2: The Sacrifice  (PC, 360)

October 6:
Comic Jumper  (360)

October 8:
Lionheart: King's Crusade  (PC)
Dragon's Lair Trilogy  (Wii)

October 11:
Sonic the Hedgehog 4  (Wii)

October 12:
Who's That Flying?!  (PSP)
Alan Wake: The Writer  (360)
Sonic theHedgehog 4  (PS3)
ZhuZhu Pets: Featuring the Wild Bunch  (DS, Wii)
Lufia: Curse of the Sinistrals  (DS)
Sniper Elite  (Wii)
Invizimals  (PSP)
Borderlands: GOTY Edition  (PS3, 360, PC)
Everquest: House of Thule  (PC)
Lucha Libre AAA Heroes of the Ring  (DS, 360, PS3, PSP)
The Shoot  (PS3)
Arcania: A Gothic Tale  (360, PC)
Just Dance 2  (Wii)
Sengoku BASARA Samurai Heroes  (PS3, Wii)
Super Scribblenauts  (DS)
Medal of Honor  (PC, 360, PS3)

October 13:
Pinball FX 2  (360)
Sonic the Hedgehog 4  (360)

October 15:
Lost Planet 2  (PC)

October 17:
Kirby's Epic Yarn  (Wii)

October 18:
Cars Toon: Mater's Tall Tales  (Wii)
Busy Scissors  (DS, Wii)
Power Gig: Rise of the SixString  (PS3, 360)
Fallout: New Vegas  (PS3)

October 19:
EA Sports  MMA  (360, PS3)
DJ Hero 2  (PS3, Wii, 360)
Vanquish  (360, PS3)
Saw 2  (PS3, 360)
Fallout: New Vegas  (PC, 360)
Active Life Explorer  (Wii)
Time Crisis: Razing Storm  (PS3)
Naruto Shippuden: Ultimate Ninja Storm 2  (PS3, 360)
Dragonball Z: Tenkaichi Tag Team  (PSP)
Blazing Souls Accelate  (PSP)
John Daly's ProStroke Golf  (360)
CSI: Fatal Conspiracy  (Wii)
Flip's Twisted World  (Wii)
Pro Evolution Soccer 2011  (PS3, 360)
Star Wars: Clone Wars Adventures  (PC)
Rock of the Dead  (360, PS3)
Empire: Total War - Gold Edition  (PC)
SBK X: Superbike World Championship  (PC, PS3, 360)

October 20:
Super Meat Boy  (360)
Casper's Scare School Spooky Sports Day  (DS)

October 25:
Art Academy  (DS)

October 26:
Deca Sports 3  (Wii)
Monopoly Streets  (Wii, PS3, 360)
Tony Hawk Shred  (360, PS3, Wii)
Monopoly  (DS)
Backyard Sports: Rookie Rush  (Wii, DS, 360)
Lego Universe  (PC)
CSI: Fatal Conspiracy  (360, PS3)
Dora's Big Birthday Adventure  (Wii, PS2)
Dora's Cooking Club  (DS)
Challenge Me: Brain Puzzles 2  (DS)
Fighters Uncaged  (360)
Z.H.P. Unlosing Ranger vs Darkdeath Evilman  (PSP)
Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's: Duel Transer  (Wii)
Stronghold: Kingdoms  (PC)
Rockband 3  (PS3, 360, Wii, DS)
WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2011  (Wii, PSP, 360, PS3, PS2)
The Sims 3  (DS, PS3, 360)
TV Superstars  (PS3)
Cabela's Dangerous Hunts 2011  (PS3, 360, Wii)
Hasbro Framily Game Night 3  (360, Wii, PS3)
Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's Tag Force 5
Crafting Mama  (DS)
The Fight: Lights Out  (PS3)
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 2  (360, PS3, Wii, PC)
Fable 3  (360)
Shaun White Skateboarding  (360, PS3, Wii)
Bakugan: Defenders of the Core  (Wii, 360, PS3, PSP, DS)
Intellivision Lives  (DS)
SingStar: Guitar  (PS3)
Mindjack  (PS3, 360)
SingStar: Dance  (PS3)
PokePark Wii: Pikachu's Adventure  (Wii)
Now that I've realized I can post pictures and videos in IE9 with compatibilty mode on, here is that picture of my offspring.

Dragon Age: Origins: Witch Hunt

Me being the sucker I am for what I consider the greatest RPG of the past decade, was estatic to hear that I could mend ties with the wayward love of my first character in Dragon Age: Origins.  After playing it, I want my admission fee back.

Witch Hunt takes place after the main campaign and promises to tie up loose ends with the most enigmatic character in the game.  This is a lie.  Witch Hunt takes two hours at the absolute most to complete and I'm fairly sure my unborn child could beat it, it's so easy.  Quite literally, I didn't have to set up any tactics.  I just let the party do what they wanted and breezed through the DLC on normal.

But it's not about the length they say.  That's a lie as well.  The focus on this expansion is Morrigan and finding out what she's up to.  Long story short: you meet up at the very end and talk for five minutes.  Nothing is resolved, and you're left with a $7 teaser for the next game.

This is by far the worst piece of DLC I've ever played.  Had it been put in with the rest of the main campaign, it would have left a huge imapct.  As it stands, I'm a little ticked off.  Buyer beware with this one.

Sick Days

What sucks about sick days is taht you have to be sick to get them.  What is nice about being a gamer on sick days is that I get to catch up on my backlog.  Today's agenda looks something like this:
1.  Download and move my saves onto my new 16GB memory card for the PSP

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
Cool Boarders
Final Fantasy VIII
Hot Shots Golf 2
Jean d'Arc

2.  Download Left 4 Dead 2 and all available DLC for only $6.79 on Steam

*3:  Track down that bitch, Morrigan in Dragon Age: Origins and find out what happened to my kid.

4.  Enter a state of nirvana

What are your plans for the day?


Left 4 Dead sale!

Left 4 Dead and Left 4 Dead 2 are on sale in the Steam store.  Normally $20, you can pick up a copy of either game for $6.79.  Get both for $10.19!  Throw in that Steam has free DLC for both and you have one hell of a deal.

Borderlands: Claptrap's Revolution: A Micro Review

So, the saga that is Borderlands, comes to a close.  Unfortunately, it closes on a rather weak note.

Claptrap's revolution finally addresses the final scene in Broderlands, the activation of the Interplanetary Ninja Assassin.  Claptrap has since then gone beyond his programming and raised a robot revolution to free the enslaved "race" of claptraps.  It is your job to bring him down.  Funny thing is, you've been hired by the people that activated him to kill you, Hyperion.

Compared to other DLC offerings, Zombie Island and General Knoxx especially, Revolution is on the meager side.  Start to finish, I had it beaten in two hours.  Of course, I was doing this on my 61 siren against play through #2's level 50 enemies.  Long story short, there was little to no challenge.  My 41 hunter on the other hand, is having one hell of a time.  It would appear that it is a balancing issue. 

Revolution sticks to the comedic gold that makes Borderlands what it is, but like the length of the campaign itself, the portions are much smaller this time around.  The character interactions and reintroductions of Knoxx are toned down to another grind/fetch quest with Tannis, and bland quest giving from the head of Hyperion.

As far as any other additions like weapons or items, there's nothing that I recognized as being new.  The promised level cap increase to 69 has yet to strike, and it's a shame, because this would have been perfect timing.

As it stands, Revolution isn't so much another chapter for Borderlands, as it is a short and unsatisfying epilogue.  Is it worth the $10 admission ticket?  I'll leave that up to you.